Saturday, September 26, 2009

I finished "Fat Girl" and I've started reading "Wasted." I hope it's good...
I read the books that anorexics like to read, I read their blogs, I look at their 'thispirational' pictures, I go to their websites. It's really quite disturbing. I'm not anorexic, obviously, but I submerge myself in their lifestyle. What is so sickly fascinating about it?, I wonder to myself often.
I have no idea. It just is.
I weighed myself earlier today, and I'm back down to 158. :
I keep thinking about all the things I used to eat...and my most recent failures, like when I over ate at Cici's, etc. etc. I'm ashamed of it and I promise myself it won't happen again, but I know that it will. But still, I'm down to 158 lbs. I need to forgive myself for those binges and stop being ashamed of my mistakes.

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