Well! Here is my new blog- http://kamikazephantom1310.xanga.com/
It's about body acceptance, but I will also be talking about my desires to lose weight on this blog, too. I can't exactly talk about my weight loss on a blog about self-acceptance, can I?
151.8 lbs. I was so happy! I mean, obviously that's not awesome, since I've been lower before, but considering that yesterday I was 154 lbs, 151.8 is pretty damn good. I'm fasting today (Well, at least partially- I ate a banana and two salads) and took my vyvanse to help me with that. I've set my "fasting" days to twice a week- thursdays and tuesdays, or Mondays and Wednesdays if I have Thursdays and Tuesdays lunch, with a 2,000 calorie day separating them. I've been exercising for an hour nearly every day for the last couple of weeks, as well, sometimes for 30 minutes on fasting days. Damn weight loss is so difficult. I can't weight until I get below 150 again. Anyway, my weigh-in tomorrow will hopefully show a weight drop- maybe I'll be 150! Wish me luck, ladies.
I've also had a lot of luck with my self-image issues, as well. I am turning my thoughts around. I don't mean to offend anybody, but now, when I hear somebody talk about how they want their BMI to be 17 or something, instead of saying "Me too, that would be great," I think "Wow, I wish they could see that they are worth something even if they don't weigh 90 lbs."
I'm still a little obsessed with my weight, yeah. But I'm getting better. I love all of you girls, even if you don't know me, and I hope that you can find a little bit of self-esteem today. You are ALL gorgeous, beautiful, perfect, and awesome JUST THE WAY YOU ARE.
P.S. Galen is pretty much the best fucking thing ever.
But now, I have a peruvian exchange student who is in love with me, as well. He's not exactly in love with me but...I made the mistake of going to lunch with him a few days ago, and he likes me...a lot. I feel bad. I told Galen about him, and then had to explain to Galen that I didn't want anybody else but him. It was a long debacle...I feel bad for the Peruvian, because he really is an nice person, and I would like to have him as a friend, but I know that he would just hurt so badly being around me but not being able to have me.
Anyway...it's a long story. But at least now I have established that Galen and I only have eyes for each other.